Hola from Cali, Colombia

I'm home. I should just say I'm in my home town. I feel sad to say this, but I feel out of place. Maybe the almost 15 years that I've been living in the US have changed me too much. I feel nostalgic when I say that I'm almost a foreigner in my own land. 

The first thing that we did "wrong" was to sit Emma without a car seat. The airport is outside of the City and the driving speed is higher. She was very excited to see motorcycles. They are everywhere. She is also excited to see taxis and buses. As soon as you drive within City limits, the publicity boards distract you from one add to the next. Ever since we got to the airport it has been like an sensory "explosion". This is something that I used to love and miss. Starting with the huge (single) line at immigration, the very little respect for personal space, the chaotic baggage claim and the welcome parties outside of customs. I really mean it when I say parties! I really thought that someone famous was on the plane. Adding to all of that, we now have a little girl to watch in addition to our bags. Our driver was waiting for us but we couldn't find him. It took us less than 5 minutes to find him but it was already a bit too much. I can just imagine what it would be like for someone who doesn't speak Spanish. 

So many things make me home sick for Colombia that it's hard to decide where my heart belongs. I love the way people treat you, my friends that I've known forever, the food, the tropical fruits, the music everywhere, the convenience of having everything you want delivered to your door, the mountains... I could go on and on. 

When I told Andre that I don't think I can live here again, he was relieved. Not long ago, we said that our goal was to move back to South America. We didn't say if it would be to Quito or Cali or Bogota but we were absolutely sure that we had to move back. Now, I'm not so sure we fit in. 

After this trip, I will have to think about how to balance the person I am today with the one that I want to be. Until that happens I have to say that my real home is where my family is. No matter where we live, as long as I am with them I feel complete.